Ep #74: It's Time: Develop Your Million-Dollar Self-Concept

Hey coach, if you are caught in a money cycle of up and down or just enough, no matter how much you make, then it's likely your challenge is a self-concept one. Self-concept is how you self-identify. And if you're still operating from an old self-concept that does not align with the money that you want to be making, then it's time for an upgrade.

I'm Kendall. Tune in this week to learn a simple four-step process for creating a new self-concept in the shortest amount of time possible, resulting in you seeing new opportunities to make and keep more money and to step into becoming that million-dollar coach that, let's be honest, you secretly want to be. It’s all here for you in this episode of The Money Coach School Podcast. Let’s dive in.

Welcome to The Money Coach School Podcast. To really excel at coaching women, you have to be skilled, confident, and even fearless at money coaching. If you're passionate about women holding genuine money power and love supporting women entrepreneurs, then this is the show for you. Now, here's your host, money feminist Kendall SummerHawk.

Hello, beautiful coaches. I am three weeks into my experience of breaking my wrist and being in a cast from my fingers to my elbow. And while it's not ideal, it is getting easier. I can now type with a little more flow with my left hand and use two fingers on my right hand, woo-hoo, which is my dominant hand. So that feels huge. It's healing and I'm grateful.

And something happened last week that reinforced for me the power of our mind and its ability to heal, yes, and to lead us into that new direction that we are craving. So hear me out for a moment. I promise this episode is going to be about money.

All right, so what happened was when I fell backwards, landed on my wrist and it broke, I heard a clear popping sound in that moment. I assumed that was the sound of the bone breaking. That was three weeks ago. But just a few days ago, I was lying in bed, kind of daydreaming in the really early morning hours, and I suddenly realized that popping sound I had heard wasn't my bone. It was the sound of the piece of horse equipment I was holding in my hand breaking when it hit the ground as well. Now for my horse girls listening I was holding a lunge whip which is made of a very thin Plastic covered in fabric.

So when I realized that that pop was not my bone but was the lunge whip breaking, I felt this rush of relief and gratitude and truthfully joy. Now why I'm sharing this tiny anecdote with you is because after having that realization, and yes, I did break my wrist, it shows on the x-ray, the day after having that realization, the pain level felt significantly better, like by 70% better. Coincidence? Maybe. But I choose to believe that when my brain realized that the pop wasn't my body but was instead a piece of plastic breaking, it decided I could feel better. It's like I was given permission to not to be in pain and to really start feeling healed.

Now the point is I am continuously amazed and impressed, really awed, with the power of our mind to determine our experience. And it can happen overnight. Which brings me to today's topic of expanding your self-concept to include greater income and wealth for you. And I'm giving you a simple four-part exercise that you can use today to put this into practice for yourself.

Now, I'm also super excited to share with you that doors are going to be open in a very short amount of time as of recording this podcast, really in just like a couple of weeks’ time for Secret Energy of Money. Secret Energy of Money is my signature mentoring program for coaches and consultants to step into the dramatically more profitable version of your business. And this is how you can get me as your money coach for either six months or one year, your choice.

So what I recommend doing is going to SecretEnergyOfMoney.com to get on the wait list now, and then you'll be the first to know when we open up enrollment, which is just around the corner.

All right, so let's dive into this four-part exercise here today. So first, what is self-concept? So what happens is we group our beliefs about ourselves into a single identity of this is who I am. It's my personality. It's just the way that I am. But really, our sense of identity is a set of beliefs that we've developed and brought together into a concept of ourselves. And then we go out and we prove it over and over and over as if it's true. In other words, our brain makes it true. In the coaching hierarchy that I teach inside certification, self-concept or identity is actually above beliefs.

In other words, it's higher in the hierarchy. It's actually the closest to the very highest in the hierarchy, which is our sense of spirit, our higher calling, our purpose. So for example, my higher calling is to change a woman's relationship with money. I know I was born to be a money coach. That's my self-concept. I am a money coach. I was born to be a money coach.

Now, a different example may be someone who says they're "just not good with money", right? We hear that all the time. That sounds like a skillset issue, but it's actually not. It's self-concept. Someone who says I am and then follows it with whatever is always self-identifying with whatever they use to complete that sentence.

So self-concept governs your beliefs because it is higher up in the hierarchy. So it governs your beliefs, your decisions, your behaviors, the skills you choose to learn, the courses you take, your environment. And as a result of all of that, ultimately self-concept governs how much you earn and keep.

And that's why someone who self-identifies as, "not being good with money", or in some way does not feel safe being a woman with money, which is very, very common, I see it all the time, will be able to make money, but will experience a money roller coaster no matter how much she does make.

It's why women have such a difficult time breaking free of old habits of make and spend, make and spend. Their self-concept isn't yet that of being a woman who has money, who has more than enough, a woman who has what I call overflow.

And trying to change your reality without being clear on your self-concept is very, very difficult and will always feel like you're climbing the steepest of hills. But this is totally within your power to change.

And this is why in my mastermind, Secret Energy of Money, we coach first on a specific money goal that you may have, like an income goal or a savings goal or a launch goal or whatever it is that you want to see upleveled and changed in your business. And we coach then almost immediately on the self-concept you need in order to achieve that goal.

You become the person who has achieved that goal at the same time as you're taking the practical specific actions to achieve it. And the result is you getting what you want. And this can happen very, very quickly.

So today I want to introduce you to a very simple four-step process to get you started creating an exciting new self-concept that in effect gives you permission to make, save and keep more money. I want you to start living and leaning into, as I like to say, into the self-concept of being a million dollar a year coach. Very simple. I don't care where you are financially right now. It doesn't matter.

I want you to start living into that self-concept of being a million dollar a year coach, which by the way is exactly what I did when I was making around $100,000 a year, year after year. And I leaned into and lived into this self-concept of being a million-dollar coach and did that in just two years. Two years later, I had quantum leaped or maybe quantum leapt is the better grammar into being a million dollar a year coach and went in to do seven multi seven figures year after year ever since that.

All right, so step number one, step number one is to stretch your idea of what's possible. In the early days, and I've been in my coaching business for like 23 years, 24 years. So in the early days of coaching way back, I did not know a coach can make a lot of money until I met a coach locally who was making $175,000 a year.

And I remember when he said that, I was blown away. First of all, I didn't know anybody who made that kind of money. I was astonished. And of course, I wanna know how did he do it? And how he did it wasn't important. What was important is that he was doing it and he was doing it consistently year after year. So that absolutely blew my mind wide open and it planted a seed.

Then about a year or two later, I met a coach who was making $2 million a year. And I was astonished to say the least.

I thought, holy smokes, I had no idea one human being, not a big company, not a corporation, not a person with a lot of employees, one person, again, at the time it was a guy, could make $2 million a year coaching. That felt extraordinary to me. And I immediately had the desire of, I want that. And I immediately had the thought of, I can do that. If he can do it, I can do it. That was then followed up with the thought of, can I do that? So it wasn't all smooth sailing in terms of conviction and confidence, but it more than planted a seed, it opened a doorway for me to say, that's the path I want to be on.

So you don't always need to look at what others are doing, but it can be very inspiring if you allow it to be inspiring and not get into, you know, not making it weird or yucky in terms of comparison. So on earning, it can be inspiring in terms of earning, saving, having, spending, lifestyle. What matters is using it as an idea of what is possible, not as a comparison of where you are not at this moment.

And I really think that my decision to become a million dollar a year coach, I think it sprang from seeing that guy making $2,000,000. I mean, I don't remember the exact timing of all that, but I just remember when I decided to be a million dollar a year coach, I had already had that doorway open. My idea of what was possible was already stretched very wide open by meeting these two other people.

So now I want you to ask yourself, million-dollar-a-year coach, we're focused on that as your self-concept, ask yourself, is it possible? Look for where you can find a yes answer. So maybe the yes answer isn't for yourself, although I hope it is, but is it possible for others? Well, yes, it is, absolutely. I mean, I'm that example for you. There's so many examples in the coaching space these days that are a yes answer. Is it people you know or don't know but are able to see? Does it feel like a yes for you? Does it feel exciting, even for the briefest of moments before fear pops in, and that's okay too? Does it feel intriguing, even for a brief moment?

That's all we're looking for, is like one crystalline moment of, yes, that's what I want. Yes, I can make that happen. How? No idea. Am I capable? No idea. None of that. Doesn't matter. Just I can make that happen for myself. Let the idea take root. Do not push it away. What if making that amount of money is your destiny? When you create the stretch in what you think is possible for you, you create that expansion that you are going to step into.

All right, so step number two is notice your thoughts. And if you notice, I say notice, don't judge. Write them down, even the ugly ones, even the ones you're not proud of, don't question them yet. That's not important right now. Just be honest. We want to excavate all the thoughts you have about being a million dollar a year coach.

So for example, when I wanted to make a lot more money, my first thought was, oh, I don't know if I can handle it. I don't know if I can handle it. And I remember having that thought. That was many, many years ago, but I remember having that thought. And it, what was it? It was being more people. I don't know if I can handle more people. I don't know if I can handle keeping them happy. That was the old people-pleasing part of me showing up. I didn't know if I could handle giving at the personalized level that is vital for me to give. So my brain wasn't solving for those things, it was creating obstacles.

Maybe your thoughts are, well, a million isn't enough, or what if it goes away, or what will I have to do, or how hard will I have to work for that amount of money? Whatever your thoughts are, write them down. You're not solving for those thoughts when you can't solve for them, when you're just swimming around with them. So write them down. And by the way, it does not give more energy to them to write them down. It does not solidify them. What it does is shine a light on them. It gets them out of you. It exposes them to sunlight. It exposes them so that you can look at them and do something with them. So just write them down.

Don't carry them around with you in your heart and in your mind. Then Step number three is we wanna create new empowering bridge thoughts. So this is where you get to find your voice, to discover your power, to feel in control and be the boss of you. You start creating new thoughts and they don't have to be, you know, the final destination of a thought, they can be what I call a bridge thought.

So for example, a bridge thought for what if it goes away or what if it's not enough could be, instead of trying to create an affirmation like, well, I will always have enough, which your brain is going to reject it. Your brain's gonna say, well, that's not true. Yeah, and we don't want that reaction. We want a bridge thought that your brain can go, huh, maybe that could be true. That's what we want.

So the bridge thought could be, what if I gave myself the power of knowledge and knowing the specifics of what I need. What if I let facts lead instead of disasterizing? That's a good one that I like practicing. So often a bridge thought will lead you to an empowering end thought and that's awesome. A bridge is a bridge. It gets you from where you are now to where you want to be.

So for example, the end thought might end up being, I know how to make money and I have all the support I need. That's a great end thought. This is how you collapse time because self-concept work doesn't need to take that long.

I want to give you a different example. I've often talked about having fully funded my retirement from zero to done in about a 10-year period of time. So my thought with saving for retirement, because I started very late, I didn't start saving in my 20s or whatever. So my thought with saving for retirement was, I know how to make money and I have time. Even though I started saving really not that long ago.

So my bridge thought was, what if I have a system for saving that keeps me feeling encouraged and not defeated? That was really vital for me because the idea of going from nothing to the amount that I wanted to create my retirement plan, it was daunting, absolutely daunting. I thought, how in the world am I gonna get there? But that was a negative thought that wasn't gonna be helpful. So the bridge thought was, what if I have a system for saving that keeps me feeling encouraged and not defeated? And that bridge thought kept me doing it and kept me doing it.

Or the situation of you want to make more money, but you have the thought, I don't know if I can handle it. Well that, you know, bridge thought could be what would it look like if my clients all received private coaching without me doing it? That was the bridge thought that I had back then. What would it look like if my clients all received private coaching without me doing it?

The other bridge thought was, what options are there for me to give my clients private coaching without me being involved? And that worked brilliantly. I started hiring coaches to coach for me very early on in my business, which freed me up dramatically.

And by the way, that bridge thought, that first thought of, I don't know if I can handle it. I was at about $100,000 a year, $80,000 to $100,000 a year. When I had that thought, I was not at the million, but the thought of what options are there for me to give my clients private coaching without me being involved, that bridge thought and the other one, that's what helped catapult me into the million dollars because then I was able with that bridge thought to go from having very small programs of just 10 and 12 people into having multiple programs and very large group coaching programs with 180, 200 people.

So my end thought in that situation was every problem has a solution and there's only one problem and that is disconnection. There's only one solution, and that is connection. So that's a whole, it's more than a bridge thought, it's actually, that's the end thought, and it's really a whole belief statement there. Every problem has a solution. There's only one problem, and that is disconnection. There's only one solution and that is connection. So really every problem has a solution and that solution is connection.

So your bridge thoughts can be a high impact question like these examples I've been giving you and that's fine. I love using high impact questions because it gives my imagination a useful and helpful direction to take instead of downward spiraling. Write your bridge thoughts down, say them out loud, allow yourself to feel good feelings about them. And if you don't, find a different bridge thought that does feel good in that moment.

All right, and step number 4, start collecting evidence. Your brain is an evidence-seeking machine. It loves doing this and it is so, so good at it. I even have just told myself, like first thing in the morning, I tell myself, please look for evidence today that I am making more money. And guess what? My brain goes and finds that evidence. It's incredible how it works that way.

What you practice, you expand. We know this. So practice noticing what others are receiving. Practice noticing what is already starting. Don't be greedy and impatient and look for the end result and discount everything until you get there. You'll never get there.

You practice noticing what is already starting. Be willing to find that evidence in the smallest of ways, tiny ways. This is what I call your becoming process. You're becoming that million dollar a year coach.

Watch for where you may discount your progress. And that's a big warning for you here. Maybe you have a $10,000 month and your brain wants to tell you, well, that's not enough. But a million-dollar coach doesn't see that. She believes it all counts. Her self-concept is being someone who celebrates being on her way because her self-concept says today's $10K month is tomorrow's $10K week.

All right, so I am doubling down this year, tripling down, quadrupling down if that's a thing in teaching and coaching you how to be successful in your relationship with money. How you make more of it, how you save it. I'm a big-time saver, which is a self-concept by the way.

How you not waste it on expenses that don't add value to your business or meaning to your life. How to be at peace with debt if you have debt, which most business owners do. How to create values with money that are intentional and serve you on the daily to make the making of money easier. How you are in relationship with money. How to shift those emotions and how to give yourself permission to be the woman with a lot of money. That's a self-concept.

If you want to do the money work that frees you to earn more, save more, and have more money, then my Secret Energy of Money mastermind may be exactly what you've been seeking. This mastermind with me is truly an exceptional integration of practical money tools plus the inner money work. Secret Energy of Money includes very specific coaching and exercises directly with me that result in you making more money, creating a new dynamic with money and knowing how to handle your money like a badass, because you are.

All right. You can check it out at SecretEnergyOfMoney.com. Now, be sure to go there, get on the wait list if you're clear that you want to start making, keeping, saving more money. And remember, money coaching changes lives, starting with yours.

All right, thank you so much for listening. Thank you for your loyalty. And if you would do me such a huge favor and leave me a five-star review, I would absolutely kiss you on the cheek for that. All right, so if you can take a moment to do that, it really helps the algorithm to get this podcast out to a lot more women like you who really care about making an impact and who want to make fabulous money. All right, my love to you. And I will see you in next week's episode.

Thank you so much for tuning into this week's episode of The Money Coach School Podcast. If you enjoyed this podcast, make sure you follow so you never miss an episode. Also, I would so love and appreciate if you would leave a 5-star review. Your review supports women just like you in discovering all of the juicy tips and insights I’m sharing here on how to coach women on money.

And if you want to learn how to excel at coaching women on money, definitely go to KendallSummerHawk.com and check out the wealth of money coach trainings that we have for you. Thanks so much for being part of this money coaching movement and for tuning into the show every week.